When You’re Tired of Being Strong All the Time
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Isaiah 40:29
Im going to be real with you-lately I’ve been tired. Not just “I need a nap” tired…but that deep, soul level tired. The kind where you’ve held it all together for so long that even trying feels heavy.
I’ve been the strong one-for my kids my husband, my team, my work, my family-and i dont say that as a badge of honor. I say it becuase somewhere along the way, being strong became my survival skill. I learned how to keep pushing, keep fixing, keep showing up, even when I was breaking inside.
But over these last few months, God has been pelling bak layers-through my sons journey, through my family, through the loss of my brother, through the changing in friendships, through betrayl, through all the things I used to hide behind-and Hes been showing me something I didnt want to admit: Im not tired because Im weak. Im tired because Ive carried things I was never meant to carry alone.
The story I didnt tell
For a long time i didnt talk about what was really happening in my life- the pain the heartache the family struggles the disappointments the fear of failing my kids my husband my work my staff my family myself my God. I smiled through it led through it prayed through it-not enought htough-but i didnt speak it-ever.
and silence sis can be so heavy
when you keep everything bottled up because you dont want to burden anyone or because youre afaid peple wont understand -it builds. it festers. and before you know ir, strngth turns to suppression.
but the moment I started to speak my story, something broke open. Not in a dramatic everything is fixed kind of way-but in a Gods-presence-is-here kind of way. Healing began when i stopped hiding.
God doesnt need your performance-he wants your presence
For so long I though strength meant not falling apart. but im learning that sometimes the strongest thing you can do is finally fall apart in teh right place.
At his feet.
Becase that is where restoration begins.
He never asked me to be perfe t. He asked me to be PRESENT.
To show up messy. to come to Him when Im weary . to trade the armor I built for hte grace He gives.
And you know what? Im done pretenting Ive got it all together. Im dont trying to be the hero in the story where Gods already the rescuer.
You can be strong and still struggle
You can love Jesus and still cry yourself to sleep some nights. you can lead adn still need help. you can be a mother a nurse a wife a boss and still have days where you just want to crawl into bed and not be needed. That doesnt make you faithless. it makes you human.
Gods not disappointeed in my tears or yours hes colleting them. hes not judging our exhaustion hes sitting with me and you in it. and hes not waiting for me or you to get it together-hes waiting for us to let go.
Father, Im tired-not in my body but in my soul. ive tried to hold it all together and im realizing i dont have to teach me to rest in you give me the courage to speak my stroy not for pity but for purpose heal what ive buried stregthen me from the inside out and remind me that its okat to not be okay because youre still God-even here, even in the mess-even in the exhaustion, even in the overwhelm-YOU ARE STILL GOD. Amen
Sis being strong all the time was never the assignment. Being real was.
You dont have to prove you strength to anyone you dont have to keep quiet about your pain your story the real one -the raw one is goin to set someone else free.
so if youre tired of being strong take a deep breath. cry if you need to, talk if you can, pray. because grace still works on the days you cant and even when your weary youre still Crowned& Called.